Blog on the Run: Reloaded

Tuesday, December 30, 2003 11:26 am

Look on her works, ye mighty, and despair

Filed under: Fun — Lex @ 11:26 am

Lots of bloggers think they know how to rave up a rant, how to pitch a bitch. They’re all wrong. Nobody does it like Dawn:

If there is one thing I understand it is the maternal instinct. But when I read things like this [the Oklahoma woman who murdered a pregnant woman and cut the fetus out of her stomach because she wanted a baby] it makes me wish I had a prosthetic LEG so I could take it off and BEAT THAT LADY TO DEATH with it. …What kind of world is this where YOUNG PEOPLE contract DEADLY DISEASE? An unfair one, that is what kind. If I ever acquire super powers I am going to anthropomorphize that meningitis bacteria and then I am going to beat it with my prosthetic leg TWICE AS HARD as I beat that lady. Those children had mothers, meningitis; did you ever stop to think what your inflammation of their teenaged braincases would do to those who RAISED THEM FROM INFANCY? I am sure you didn’t. That is why my prosthetic knee is going upside your bacterial head.

I am in a MOOD so I am going to do something that relaxes me. I will probably clean for seven or eight hours, but then so help me I am going to sit down and make the sweetest arts and crafts you have ever seen. Did someone say pasta angels? They are so AWESOME I cannot even BELIEVE IT.

That is why my prosthetic knee is going upside your bacterial head. Ladies and gentlemen, I. Rest. My. Case.

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