Blog on the Run: Reloaded

Saturday, August 29, 2009 3:52 pm

Hot wheels

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 3:52 pm
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Hooper outgrew his old bike, so we found him a bigger one:

“This is the sweetest thing of my entire life!” he announced after riding it for a half-hour or so. “But, boy, does my penis hurt!”

Saturday, August 15, 2009 7:23 pm

Where did I go wrong?

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 7:23 pm
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Hooper has been bugging me for several years to take him to a monster-truck rally. I’m not philosophically opposed; in fact, appropriately earplugged, I’d probably enjoy it, especially if they sell beer.

But now he also wants me to take him to a NASCAR race. Not only that, he has a favorite driver whom he wants to win, Jimmy Johnson. Not only THAT, he knows that Johnson’s primary sponsor is Lowe’s.

I could blame TV for this, but I think it would be more fun to blame Dustin.

Thursday, August 13, 2009 10:12 pm

$32 for all this good cheer

Filed under: Fun,Hooper,Victoria — Lex @ 10:12 pm
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Renewed my driver’s license today.

Victoria: In the new picture, your face isn’t as round. In fact, it’s really bony and craggy.

Hooper: Daddy, can I have your old license for when you die? [V. and I look at him funny.] What? I would miss him, so I want something to remember him by after he’s gone!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009 8:44 pm

World’s charmingest breakfast companion

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 8:44 pm
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Hooper (smacking lips after a sip of lemon-lime soda [don’t ask]): Ahhhh. Boiled to perfection! (belches loudly for several seconds) You know, I never get tired of that.

Sunday, July 19, 2009 11:02 pm

Dang, they grow up fast

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 11:02 pm
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We dropped Hooper off today for his first stay at sleep-away camp. Coincidentally, his cabin mates include a guy he knows from school and a guy he knows from church, but he’d have been happy in a room full of total strangers — he was really jazzed about this. In fact, he was so jazzed that he stopped bouncing off the walls at one point just long enough to say to one of his counselors, “I’m overreacting, aren’t I?”

Have a great time, buddy. We’ll see you Friday night.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009 7:15 pm

Memie reports …

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 7:15 pm
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… on how the week with the grandkids is going:

We all had cake and ice cream last night for V’s bday. Except Hooper. Who asked for boiled peanuts instead.

That boy’s not right.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009 8:47 pm

For a good cause

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 8:47 pm
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Hooper contributed this acrylic-on-canvas painting to an auction benefiting Espwa, an orphanage in Haiti our church supports.

Hooper contributed this acrylic-on-canvas painting to an auction benefiting Espwa, an orphanage in Haiti our church supports.

… and it sold for $20.

Previously.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009 9:02 pm

New health hazard: zombie mimes

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 9:02 pm
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Setting: My study, a few nights ago. DADDY is doing banking and/or bill-paying, I can’t remember exactly. Enter HOOPER.

Hooper: Daddy, I had a nightmare. (crawls into my lap; snuggles)

Daddy: I’m sorry, buddy. Do you remember what it was about?

Hooper: Yes. (pause) Zombie mines.

Daddy: What? ‘Zombie mines’?

Hooper: Yeah. (pause) Not the mines like you dig. The other kind.

Daddy: The kind that blow up?

Hooper: No. The kind that wear makeup.

Daddy: (understanding slowly dawning) Oooooohhhh. Zombie mimes.

Hooper: Yes. Those. I was scared of them.

Daddy: Well, I would be, too, buddy. But it’s OK. They’re not real. It was just a dream. (trundles Hooper back off to bed)

* * *

Only here’s the thing.

First, if a mime was a zombie, how, at any safe distance, could you tell it from a normal mime? Is there some special mimetic gesture that’s the equivalent of droning, “BRRRRAAAAAAAIIIIIINNNNNNSSSSSSSS”? And if so, why haven’t we been warned?

Second, that night, I also dreamed of zombie mimes. And they were, indeed, scary.

Friday, April 3, 2009 8:06 pm

Winning big

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 8:06 pm
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At this year’s Pack 104 Pinewood Derby, Hooper’s car didn’t win any races, but he won the Cubmaster Award, given to the Cub Scout whose Pinewood Derby car looks most like he made it himself, with no adult help. We had to leave before the derby was over, so we weren’t there for the announcement. When Hooper’s cubmaster brought the trophy to the house later on, he said the vote had been unanimous.

Hooper had been bumming a bit about not having won any races — he knew we should have added some weight to the car, but he had chosen not to anyway. But this trophy made him feel MUCH better. In fact, he tried to stuff the thing into his bookbag to take to school today. It didn’t come close to fitting, so it stayed home.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009 10:14 pm

Straight to the top

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 10:14 pm

During a guidance counseling session at school, Hooper’s class worked on problem-solving. Here’s his answer to one of the questions:

Straight to the top

Straight to the top

Saturday, February 14, 2009 5:06 pm

One more thing he says wrong that I’m going to miss when he starts saying it right

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 5:06 pm

His favorite candy: peanut Enamems.

Kind of like his favorite pasta: puzghetti.

Monday, February 2, 2009 7:31 pm

Even worse than the Rock Wall of Death

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 7:31 pm
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Frank’s girls were here this weekend, and on Sunday I took all five kids to the playground for a couple of hours.

As I frequently do, I pretended to be a monster and chased Hooper around the playground equipment. He loves that game. He would announce that he was going to escape from me by “climbing the Rock Wall of Death!” or “sliding down the Sliding Board of Doom!” So his cousin Whitney started playing too — and brought the monster to his knees with laughter by announcing, “I’m gonna hide on the Swingset of Aggravation!”

The Swingset of Aggravation. Been there, done that, have the knee scabs.

UPDATE: Mom writes, “Loved the swingset of aggravation…. Wasn’t that in Pilgrim’s Progress?”

Monday, January 19, 2009 3:35 pm

Must … use … powers … for … good …

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 3:35 pm
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So we and the kids are over at a friend’s for a brunch gathering, and after a while, I find that as a result of Hooper’s powers influence charisma, I must have the following dialogue with another parent:

Me: So, does [your 5-year-old daughter] take off her shoes and socks and leave them in strange places, shoot people with Nerf dart guns, rave about Transformers and yell, “Me! Want! Brownies!”?

Friend: No.

Me: Well, she does now.

Not only that, but said 5-year-old daughter has come over this afternoon to play Transformers with Hooper. And they’re having a blast.

UPDATE: Hooper and this girl are now out in the backyard with swords, playing pirate. And he might have met his match. As I was attending to the girl’s bleeding thumb after a minor hangnail-related incident, she announced, “I’m only 5 and I can read chapter books. I’m a very interesting kid.”

Wednesday, January 7, 2009 7:39 pm

If only I could

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 7:39 pm
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Hooper (on not being able to connect to the wireless network):  Daddy! You’ve got to fix the Internet!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008 8:31 pm

Voice of doom

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 8:31 pm

Hooper: Daddy, I’ve been practicing my roar and it’s really loud now. Wanna hear?

Me: Sure!

Hooper: ROOOAAAAARRRRR!!!

Me: That’s pretty loud!

Hooper: Thanks!

Me: Lemme ask you a question. Why would you want to use a roar like that?

Hooper (after thinking a second): If somebody was picking on me.

Me: If somebody was picking on you?

Hooper: Yeah. Like today, [Victoria’s friend A] and [Victoria’s friend B] were calling me a scaredy-cat.

Me: What are you scared of?

Hooper: Nothing.

Me: So why were they calling you a scaredy-cat?

Hooper: Because they could.

Me: So what did you do?

Hooper: I roared!

Me: And what happened?

Hooper: They ran off into the girls’ bathroom. That’s where they were when you got there.

Me: Well, OK, then.

Hooper: But I still have to practice. You never know when you’ll need a roar.

Monday, December 29, 2008 9:53 pm

Some men dream of climbing mountains …

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 9:53 pm

Hooper: What if I could take off pieces of my head but it didn’t hurt? That would be cool.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008 7:11 am

Hooperian Physics

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 7:11 am
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Hooper: Daddy, do you know what the most powerfulest thing in the world is? It’s an electromagnetic pulse generator! Because it can destroy everything in the world! Except animals. Because they’re not electric. And humans. And trees, I think.

Daddy: Really.

Hooper: Yeah, it could knock out all the electricity and you couldn’t ever fix it.

Daddy: That’s very interesting, buddy. Where’d you learn that?

Hooper: On “Transformers”!

Sunday, December 7, 2008 6:33 pm

To the victors go the spoils trophies … and doughnuts

Filed under: Fusion,Hooper — Lex @ 6:33 pm
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Another one I’ve just now gotten around to pulling off the phone: Hooper receives his trophy from Coach Alex as the Fusion celebrates its undefeated fall season Nov. 15 at Krispy Kreme. It was a good season, Hooper had a (generally) good time, and Coach Alex did a great job.

Saturday, November 22, 2008 12:01 am

Dusting

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 12:01 am
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We got a dusting of snow early this morning, just enough to make schools open 2 hours late. Hooper, during whose life Greensboro has only gotten one good snowstorm, enjoys the dusting before school.

Hooper in the snow, 11/21/2008

Tuesday, November 18, 2008 11:10 pm

Unintended consequences

Filed under: Hooper,Victoria — Lex @ 11:10 pm
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Victoria: Daddy, Hooper was playing Minesweeper on Mommy’s laptop when he wasn’t supposed to be!

Hooper: Well! No massages for you!

Victoria: Massages? You’ve never given me a massage!

Hooper: No more!

Thursday, November 6, 2008 9:43 pm

How they think

Filed under: Hooper,Victoria — Lex @ 9:43 pm
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Victoria: Daddy, can I have some Halloween candy for dessert? In light of the economy?

* * *

Hooper (reading aloud from verb-tense homework): “‘The turtle will trick the spider.’ Well, that’s gotta be future, because turtles and spiders can’t talk yet.”

Saturday, October 25, 2008 5:38 pm

Family portrait

Filed under: Hooper,Victoria — Lex @ 5:38 pm
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Perhaps the first shot of the four of us together since Disney World in ’05. Not sure what led Hooper to put his finger in his mouth ….

Portrait of the artist as a young camera-grabber

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 5:20 pm
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Sauce for the gander

Filed under: Hooper — Lex @ 5:09 pm
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Since I posted a photo earlier of Victoria with a fish she caught, it’s only fair to post one of Hooper. Good work, buddy!

Monday, October 13, 2008 8:39 pm

Well, yeah, but that’s not quite the point

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 8:39 pm
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On Sunday our church had a cookout (and pie-judging contest) at the chicken farm of a couple of our members, out near McLeansville. It featured a petting zoo, horse and pony rides and hay rides. As the tractor pulling our hay trailer started to move, Hooper looked down and announced, “Now we’re going to kill some grass.”

Earlier tonight, he told me about a dream he had on Sunday night: “I was in this town called Bakugan Town that had every kind of Bakugan there is. And I was the mayor. And *I* had every kind of Bakugan there is. (pause) And I had a butler. And it was you. That was a good dream.”

Saturday, October 11, 2008 7:32 pm

Flame 5, Fusion 4

Filed under: Fusion,Hooper — Lex @ 7:32 pm
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The Fusion finally got a second game in, what with all the rain. Unfortunately, they didn’t play very well as a team for most of the game. One of the Flame’s goals was an own goal. Hooper spent a quarter in goal and gave up two, but only one of them was anywhere close to preventable. He displayed remarkable equanimity after the game.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008 9:21 pm

I know just how he feels

Filed under: Fun,Hooper — Lex @ 9:21 pm
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Hooper (earlier this evening): “I’m ready to go to bed, Daddy. I haven’t gotten a wink of sleep the whole day.”

Tuesday, September 23, 2008 7:43 am

Of Fusion, Buttercups and Panthers

Filed under: Hooper,Panthers,Victoria — Lex @ 7:43 am
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Fusion: Won 8-1. Minute to minute the game never seemed like a runaway, but that’s what it ended up being. Hooper didn’t score and spent one uneventful quarter in goal.

Buttercups: Lost 3-0. The team lacked energy and quickness, and it didn’t possess the ball much as a result.

Panthers: Lost 20-10 and stunk up the joint in the process. I was doing yard work and didn’t see the game; just as well.

Saturday, September 13, 2008 7:58 pm

Fusion 2, Arsenal 2

Filed under: Fusion,Hooper — Lex @ 7:58 pm
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After last weekend’s rainout, Hooper’s team played its first game today. The Arsenal controlled the ball more and better, but the Fusion hung in there. Hooper hasn’t played soccer as long as most of his teammates, and he’s still learning the mental aspects of the game, but he at least was trying to pass in the right places.

Saturday, September 6, 2008 9:09 am

Hanna 1, Fusion 0

Filed under: Fusion,Hooper — Lex @ 9:09 am
Tags: , ,

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes it rains.

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